Notes from a Millennial

UtahJoe

Team Workhorse
Team MTBNJ Halter's
I went to a wedding where the bride rode in on a horse.
oh we did that at my wedding too
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rottin'

Well-Known Member
Staff member
Team MTBNJ Halter's
My wife and I had two weddings. We spent a week in Miami with our closest family and friends and then got married on the beach, had a brief reception, and then hopped on a cruise. We had the big Italian reception a month later in NJ. If you're gonna get married, I suggest two weddings instead of zero weddings.
Ha...so did we. Initially a big wedding planned with all the trimmings, but decided to F that. Instead we went to Vegas for a quick marriage, then a month later a big destination wedding in Aruba with all family and friends...was a total blast. And way cheaper than everything planned up here...but that was over 20 years ago, so YMMV these days
 

Kaleidopete

Well-Known Member
Ancient history
My wedding. June 23 1964
I remember saying to my mother and father that I’d like to marry. I had been dating my girlfriend for about a year and a half. We now wanted to marry. My mother was OK with it, but not my grouchy old Italian father. His answer was “if you can do it within one week from today I’ll sign the papers”. I wasn’t twenty one years old yet and needed a parents signature to marry. So I took the challenge and managed to make it happen. Tuesday night, six PM, one week to the day at a local church. The pastor was nice and held the flowers over from the Sunday service so it would look nice for us. His fee was twenty five dollars. So I worked my job Monday and Tuesday as usual and then we married at six PM with some family and friends present. My father wouldn’t come, but did say to my mother “if you have anything you want to do tonight, go ahead”. He was a tough old buzzard. So my mom came. There was a small party afterwards at my wife’s parents house and that was it. Back to work on Wednesday, no honeymoon, just back to work as usual. No regrets, a great wife and a great life followed. Just a side note, I was working as a men’s clothing salesman at a mall in Paramus. Ten hours a day for six days a week, pay $1. an hour when I bought the wedding and engagement rings. I got them used at a pawn shop in Newark for $100. That was almost two weeks pay! Then I got a better job, same pay sixty dollars a week, but only eight hours a day for five days a week. Ah! The good old days.

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UtahJoe

Team Workhorse
Team MTBNJ Halter's
Ancient history
My wedding. June 23 1964
I remember saying to my mother and father that I’d like to marry. I had been dating my girlfriend for about a year and a half. We now wanted to marry. My mother was OK with it, but not my grouchy old Italian father. His answer was “if you can do it within one week from today I’ll sign the papers”. I wasn’t twenty one years old yet and needed a parents signature to marry. So I took the challenge and managed to make it happen. Tuesday night, six PM, one week to the day at a local church. The pastor was nice and held the flowers over from the Sunday service so it would look nice for us. His fee was twenty five dollars. So I worked my job Monday and Tuesday as usual and then we married at six PM with some family and friends present. My father wouldn’t come, but did say to my mother “if you have anything you want to do tonight, go ahead”. He was a tough old buzzard. So my mom came. There was a small party afterwards at my wife’s parents house and that was it. Back to work on Wednesday, no honeymoon, just back to work as usual. No regrets, a great wife and a great life followed. Just a side note, I was working as a men’s clothing salesman at a mall in Paramus. Ten hours a day for six days a week, pay $1. an hour when I bought the wedding and engagement rings. I got them used at a pawn shop in Newark for $100. That was almost two weeks pay! Then I got a better job, same pay sixty dollars a week, but only eight hours a day for five days a week. Ah! The good old days.

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Pete I have to take us off on a tangent bc im just very curious....But I know at this time your Mom drove a 59 caddy eldorado and you guys also had an XKE.....So im guessing your father made a good living.....what was his objection? Did he think you were too young? Did your wife go to a different Church? I mean jeez, you think he could have spotted you the $25 when hes rolling around in a Jag :) Of course...most good life lessons are usually ones we REALLY hate in the moment
 

Kaleidopete

Well-Known Member
Pete I have to take us off on a tangent bc im just very curious....But I know at this time your Mom drove a 59 caddy eldorado and you guys also had an XKE.....So im guessing your father made a good living.....what was his objection? Did he think you were too young? Did your wife go to a different Church? I mean jeez, you think he could have spotted you the $25 when hes rolling around in a Jag :) Of course...most good life lessons are usually ones we REALLY hate in the moment
He just objected my girlfriend, like no one is ever good enough for your kid to marry kind of thing.
 

Santapez

Well-Known Member
Team MTBNJ Halter's
He just objected my girlfriend, like no one is ever good enough for your kid to marry kind of thing.
My dad married someone outside of the community and it was a big deal. At the wedding my grandmother made the comment "WE'LL SEE HOW LONG IT LASTS".

5 Decades later...
 

gmb3

JORBA: Sourlands
JORBA.ORG
He just objected my girlfriend, like no one is ever good enough for your kid to marry kind of thing.
ok, now i'm curious. Did Dad ever warm up to wifey, or was he always salty? Also, did your wife hold a grudge back?
 

UtahJoe

Team Workhorse
Team MTBNJ Halter's
He just objected my girlfriend, like no one is ever good enough for your kid to marry kind of thing.
well I mean in his defense Pete...she doesn't look very Italian :) My father was 100% italian, my mother is a red headed Irish/swedish women....His parents were equally as excited as it sounds like your dad was

Contrast this to me getting married in 2010...one of my older family members asked me what religion my wife was.....to which I responded....I have no idea, I have never asked her.
 

JimN

Captain Wildcat
Team MTBNJ Halter's
Contrast this to me getting married in 2010...one of my older family members asked me what religion my wife was.....to which I responded....I have no idea, I have never asked her.

I tell this story a lot because it's funny, but there was a bit of hubbub with some of our older relatives on both sides when they found out we were getting married on a beach and not in a catholic church. We got married by a justice of the peace who happened to be jewish, and we asked if he had a priest outfit and collar and stuff, and he was like yeah no problem. So we have pictures that look like we're being married by a catholic priest on the beach. At our wedding reception in NJ, we had a slideshow of pictures from the actual wedding, including pictures of "the priest." One of my great uncles actually came up to me at the reception, to verify that we did indeed get married by a catholic priest, and I was like, "of course! we have pictures, make sure you don't miss the slideshow." He was very happy.
 

UtahJoe

Team Workhorse
Team MTBNJ Halter's
You should have said, "The flying spaghetti monster one."
this would have been the way to go if they had ever heard of it......in fact my wife was Lutheran.....so I once asked my father in law who is now 87 why he was Lutheran over some of the other non catholic ones....he said to me: well, we moved into this house in madison in the 1940s, there was a Lutheran church right across the street...So my father announced, we are now Lutheran. Makes me wonder....was choosing your christian religion at this time like choosing your wireless carrier today?
 

UtahJoe

Team Workhorse
Team MTBNJ Halter's
Well it is official, we'll be getting married on 2/2/2022. The ceremony will be done by our town's mayor who I know pretty well from that time I ran for town council and lost.
well I hope he charges your less than $25.

And going back to @Kaleidopete s story for a minute.....you know...$25 in 1964 is about $225 today.....I mean...HEY PADRE' you arent paying any taxes on this property and how many dollars have I put in this collection plate????.....How about a comp on a BUSY tuesday night for a 20 year old kid and his GF? Jeez.
 

roc

Well-Known Member
I tell this story a lot because it's funny, but there was a bit of hubbub with some of our older relatives on both sides when they found out we were getting married on a beach and not in a catholic church. We got married by a justice of the peace who happened to be jewish, and we asked if he had a priest outfit and collar and stuff, and he was like yeah no problem. So we have pictures that look like we're being married by a catholic priest on the beach. At our wedding reception in NJ, we had a slideshow of pictures from the actual wedding, including pictures of "the priest." One of my great uncles actually came up to me at the reception, to verify that we did indeed get married by a catholic priest, and I was like, "of course! we have pictures, make sure you don't miss the slideshow." He was very happy.

I had the same reaction from my mom. My wife and I got married at the Valhalla club and she wanted to know what church. "mom, no church, I haven't been to church since I got my license." She kept telling me, " come on, seriously, what church??"

On a side note, I am pretty sure my mom and Aunt secretly baptized my kids.
 

Patrick

Overthinking the draft from the basement already
Staff member
We were Married by a guy next to a stream in the Poconos. We called 800-wedding and said we need a guy and a photographer, keep the.chapel as.a.backup in case it rained. Took about 30 minutes to plan. 4 parents, 2 siblings, and a friend. Done in 30 minutes. That was 31 years ago.

Mom threw a party at the Sheraton in Parsippany for the family a few months later.

We stayed at the pocono garden lodge on wedding night. No champagne tub, but George Lopez was the entertainment in the club - he was awesome.
(No phrasing Dan)

On the Italian thing. My wife has a classic Jewish last name. More of a mutt, her family lived in the Midwest for a couple hundred years (yes she is in DAR) so Baptist parents.

Being I'm 100% Italian blood on both sides, my Grandma asks her if she is Italian. She says no, so she asks if she is Jewish. She says no. Grandma asks no more questions along those lines and starts asking more normal stuff.😀
 

Santapez

Well-Known Member
Team MTBNJ Halter's
I had the same reaction from my mom. My wife and I got married at the Valhalla club and she wanted to know what church. "mom, no church, I haven't been to church since I got my license." She kept telling me, " come on, seriously, what church??"

On a side note, I am pretty sure my mom and Aunt secretly baptized my kids.
I read this and was trying to figure out what license you got at church.
 
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