Your biggest problem will be collecting the $$$.
A slightly more serious suggestion is...
A bike without pedals and a seat is probably less likely to be stolen. Think about it from the thief's perspective. Your bike is just a faster and cheaper means to go 10 blocks. But, if I can't pedal it and I will have a pole up my ass as well, then I might look for another alternative. A false flat tire may add to the effect. You can recover these 3 items in about 2 minutes though with a seat clamp, a 15mm cone-wrench and a CO2 cartridge. Further, moving the bike around might help, as opposed to the same bike in the same place.