Spring Silence: Uncoiling the Fat Dragon

Norm said:
If not, suppose now you have no more money and were up all night with a vomiting child and got 2 hours of sleep?
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if this were the situation (and i feel like i haven't slept in three years because of my kids) i would slurp the liquid hope right out of the bag. hell, even if the bag were 8 days old. gum included if it was hot enough.

i'd even consider injecting it.
 
Norm said:
Jake I'm disappointed in you. I thought you were my go-to guy here. Truth is that a post-it note that I threw away yesterday was on the bag this morning which led me to this thought. But I was too vague.

Suppose you know with absolute certainty that the bag was changed and still clean - say you bought and installed the bag yourself. Does your answer change?

If not, suppose now you have no more money and were up all night with a vomiting child and got 2 hours of sleep?

I'll be honest, that coffee is coming out of the trash for me. With a big shit-eating grin.

In the case of the cream cheese, I couldn't eat it if it touched the floor at work. At home I might save it and trim off the part that touched the floor but it would have to be a large blob to make it worth it.
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given the post-it note proof, then yes, i drink the coffee. no questions asked and particularly in the 'up all night with a vomiting child' scenario.

i'm not a big cream cheese fan so i'd leave it.

this is like the idiots version of Double Dare.
 
woody said:
How about a big glob of cream cheese that dropped from your bagel onto the office carpet, which hasn't been vacuumed in years?

My old boss swiped it up with his finger and shoved it into his pie hole without a moment's hesitation.
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3 second rule in effect.
 
I took a bite out of a lime that had bar room darts stuck in it. Who knows how long the lime had been sitting on the ledge of that dart board, or who touched it.

I was violently ill for like 2 days.
 
Protest against Wall Street today. Place is like a war zone....

From the tomb of Jimmy Hoffa:

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Protest against Wall Street today. Place is like a war zone. Mounted police and artillery on every corner.

Oh shit I appear to have run across their parade route on my walk to the Path. Man what a lame procession.

These people need bikes.
 
Those garbage bags are made on machines with all kinds of crap all over them from recycled plastic with god knows what addatives. I'm not drinking from the bag.
 
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This is one of those Choose Your Own Adventure books:

Bill chooses to leave the coffee. He falls asleep and does not meet his deadline. He loses the biggest contract the company has and closes shop 6 months later. Children starve.

I have nothing of value to post today. I woke up and went to work. I do get a new iPhone today finally. This thing is useless without a cable for much more than 2 hours. Anything below 60% battery and it can die at any moment.

Tomorrow I ride something somewhere.
 
I think that’s too loud even for me. Like an iCreamsicle.

From the tomb of Jimmy Hoffa:

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I think that’s too loud even for me. Like an iCreamsicle.
 
Spencer the Kalmyk said:
^^^^ The wife has the same exact configuration^^^^
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My wife went and got the phone for me yesterday, and grabbed the orange "bumper" is what they call it. She admitted this was the conversation she had with the guy at the Apple store:

Wife: OMG this is hideous.
Dude: Laughs
Wife: I'm going to buy it anyway.
Dude: Laughs
Wife: Norm's friend Lou will love it, it's so metrosexual
Dude: Word.

Honestly I really want to keep it because of the absurdity of it all. But then I think of whipping this thing out on the Path and how absurd it would look. I always opt for the blue/orange colors but they're both on the P-town side of things. So I need to stray from the usual. I went with the white phone because black is too easy. But not I see how this damn thing is going to clash with like 85% of my outfits, especially after Labor Day.

This may sound out of left field but it's not. Cyndi Lauper sang that really atrocious song back when Lou & I were kids. Here's the thing, it's not just girls. I mean, most people just want to have fun. Others have to stop pissing in your corn flakes when they wake up on the wrong side of the bed every day. And don't look to others to kiss the ass that has a stick permanently planted up it.

So anyway, I said I would give work through this week to really asses how I feel and where my head is at. Notwithstanding the comment above, I think yesterday was a bit of a turning of the corner in several ways. I'll try to sit down and make sense of it this weekend maybe, or Monday, whatever. Last night I was playing with the new phone so didn't have any time.

I don't think I'll get 100 in today but I think 90 is a fair guess. Utah should be here in 20 and then we're gong to swing down to get Kirt. Then I may strike out West to hit up Iron Bridge. If it rains I'll skip that however.
 
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