There's a serious point where living out of a van/RV makes no sense on the dollars to value equation. Especially the bigger you go in Van/RV costs, that pays for a lot of flights & hotels. IE, places with toilets where someone else cleans them.
NJ (East of the Mississippi in general) is a poor spot for vans purely because there's so little free land to park a van on. Out west you have much more BLM land and/or campsites that are worth going to. Hard to do destination weekends with a van as you can't really get anywhere worthwhile.
I do a lot of traveling with my Jeep, we generally go in groups out to Utah, Southern Cali, Northern Cali. People in my group have everything from a bike packing setup in their rig to a full blown half million toy hauler. After about five years my observations are as follows:
1. On the east coast if you have a large RV and go to a camp site you are literally just staring at other RV’s - unless you are in the Florida Keys, then it is water and other RV’s. Not very appealing to me
2. I concur on pooping, I use a hotel (Hampton Inns are my go to on the road - they are plentiful, open 24hrs and I can usually grab a coffee)
3. Once you factor in the cost of your setup, fuel and maintenance - some times it makes more sense to stay in a hotel or Airbnb. The big dollar rigs are really nice in the desert, especially if you know someone who owns one. I would never buy one, cost benefit is not there for me at this age But maybe when I am older and more achy.
4. I pack a tent shower and carry 10 gallons of water - for camping situations this is more than adequate and provides enough to cook/clean
5. Split long travels up with a home base somewhere we wheel or hike - this allows catch up on laundry and some R&R on a warm couch - great on long trips with lots of driving time
6. If you plan on going to remote sites out west 4x4 can be huge, especially in sandy areas that may flash flood (happens a lot out west and holy cow does everything change in twenty minutes)
7. Be self sufficient out west as huge areas have little to no reception, which is awesome
8. At the end of the day you can make anything work with pre-planning, patience, some sacrifice and once again pre-planning
9. A warm fire solves a lot of problems
10. Most all food can be cooked outside and is half the fun for Me. I also pack a Coleman gas coffee maker which is my favorite camping piece of equipment. I think someone makes one that works off an impact battery now as well.
11. A fridge/freezer is a huge life comfort on extended camps in remoteness.
I have done multiple day trips living in the woods out of my old Blue Jeep TJ - fully packing all my tools to fix it as well - this was mostly done in NH, VT, PA and MA
I just acquired a Toyota Camry, my wife and I are doing a coast to coast hiking trip in the fall with it and will mix camping and air bnb.