My husband tells me to just let it go. But I feel that some things just need to be said. I guess thats the estrogen in me.
So here's my response to Matty, and anyone else playing with him today:
The way to encourage is NOT:
You cant do this
I don’t believe you are doing this
Liar
(which is what I heard, by the way)
The way to really encourage is with positive reinforcement:
Hey great job
I will volunteer to take you on that 30 mile ride, lets go
I am going to ceres today, wanna work on skinny skills with me?
When I ride with someone who says:
Hey whats wrong cant keep up?
I respond negatively, and take the attitude why bother.
When I ride with someone who says:
Hey way to go JM I am amazed you rode that heavy bike up that hill
Or wow we are on mountain bikes on the Henry Hudson and doing 15, that’s a good pace
I know you can do it!
I respond positively with the drive to go even a step further, or faster.
Even better when I overheard someone say:
I couldn’t believe she was just grinding that bike up some of the hills at hartshorn when we rode there together.
It makes me want to bring that bike there and do EVERY hill not just some of them
Want to see me go to the next level? Encourage positively. Even better, volunteer to help me. Like I did with all those beginner people last summer, and would keep doing except for I was warned about liabilities, which SUCKS!
When you start the drama, which you did by crying like a baby “I don’t wanna compete against someone who isn’t doing what I do” and I DEFEND myself, or share my feelings, why is that considered being a drama queen? Does this in fact make you a drama king?
You got what you wanted. You don’t have to compete against me. Am I being childish now? Yup. And I admit it. My feelings were hurt. But I am man (woman) enough to admit my feelings and not hide them, and then discuss them in a rational manner without pointing fingers and making innuendos.
The “go figure” remark was uncalled for. Know why I don’t want the “free” one. Nothing in life is free. I also ride 3, sometimes 4 different bikes. I also am not going to do this to satisfy your desire to quantify my riding. I had another “free” offer made in private. I may take him up on it because it was made for the RIGHT reason and not the wrong one. But then again I may not as I know MY limitations and the problems a bar mounted unit will cause me on the trails. Not the road so much, but on the trails resulted in disaster for me in the past. And truly I do not trust myself to NOT do it again. I can become very competitive and fixated on speed. So any unit I use on the trails MUST be in my pocket or backpack.
I am also short funded right now, which is why I was looking at cheaper units. But that is not something I wanted to have to admit to anyone. And honestly, if I cant have the one I WANT, I would rather not have any. My husband told me a long time ago I should never ever have to settle. He is right. And I love him for it, he is the BEST, that is why I married him.
Now. Lets forget the race and go PLAY! For fun. 😀